Wednesday, September 15, 2010

The most random comment yet

I'm sure some of you may wonder what kind of comments I get, having our precious little Ethiopian guy with us. The questions really don't bother me and most of the time I just use my answers to educate the public on what Ethiopian adoption is all about. One of the first comments I remember was when we were coming home from Ethiopia in the Atlanta airport. We were riding up the escalator and these two African America women were riding down right next to us. One of them said to the other "What is that white girl doing with that black baby?" I laughed and said are they talking about me? It was my first comment and really didn't know what to say, I was shocked but I thought it was pretty funny. Many times I walk around stores thinking people are staring at me and think "why are they staring at me?" I completely forget Jonas is with me and that must be why. It's crazy how his skin color means nothing to me... it's the same as people who have blonde vs brown hair, or blue or brown eyes. To tell you the truth, I would LOVE to have brown skin... then I wouldn't have to like lying in the sun so much:)
It is funny that when i do figure out that someone is staring at us, I know their judgement might be running across their thoughts... but within seconds Jonas will give them his huge smile and say "Hi" perfectly. He melts every one's heart in a minute! I often wonder how many strangers we come across in a day that might think differently about adoption or that they too could adopt because of this precious boy. I have a lot of strangers wanting to hold him which I think is a little strange but we can't leave from a store without someone saying how stinkin' cute he is. When you have twins you get the same kind of treatment when they are babies... everyone asks you questions, so we were used to it. So are you ready for the most random comment yet? Let me warn you, I was not offended, I offer grace for those that may not understand.

I really didn't have much of a chance to explain either.

I'm walking out to my car from Target and Jonas is in the shopping cart. I get to my car and this lady says "Is that your baby?"in her thick southern accent. I said "Yes" She says "Don't take this the wrong way but I just love mixed babies, he's so cute" I just said thank you and didn't feel the need to correct her as I was loading stuff into the car. She turns around as her mom is walking up to her and says "Hey mom, he is hers... he's just so f**ing cute" I was shocked at what she just said and I started laughing thinking that is a new one .. he's F**ing cute... I got in the car and said wow that was random.

I know Jonas is going to change many people's perspective...especially when it comes to passing judgement. I read something really good from my daily devotion .. message from GOD.. Give your mind a break from it's habitual judging. You form judgments about this situation, that situation, this person, that person, yourself, even the weather- as if judging were your main function in life. I created you to be rich in communication with me. When you become preoccupied with passing judgement you usurp MY role.

I'm going to be truthful, one of my biggest pet peeves is when a friend is judging another person... it's just like nails on a chalk board for me! We have no right to act as we know how someone is thinking or why they are the way they are.. that's between God and his child .. not us. Don't get me wrong I'm sure I have done it my fair share, we are all sinners, but it really bugs me as I hate it when I have done it. It really makes me feel awful as God loves each and every one of us just as we are. Whether it be about someone's looks, or their attitude... it all just drives me crazy to pass judgement on another human being. God has definitely broken my heart for this area in my life.. I hope he does the same for you.


Julie said...

A good friend of mine was with her 3 month old AA baby (a domestic adoption), when someone walked up to her and asked if she was a black albino. Really? Who even thinks up that kind of question? :)

phillips phamily said...

If you were at the Target I think you were at, I'm not surprised at that comment! RANDOM people there often.

Mallorie said...

The comment I got was: "Kudos to you for raising something that isnt yours". I thought, well, he is not a thing and he IS mine. I didnt use that moment to make it educational for this women. I knew it would have been lost on her!
Adoption is awesome!

Carissa said...

Great post, Heidi. We have not gotten too many comments yet, but the looks have been interesting! It is so easy for me to make snap judgments about others, yet when people do that to me, I get upset! I always need to focus more on who God says I am and others around me, whom He loves!

Our Family said...

We get lots of stares and questions like, "Are they all yours?" already so I'll be interested how those will change when we add 3 beautiful, brown girls and a baby! Thankfully, God has given me the ability not to be offended by strangers remarks. I try to put myself in their shoes. They have no clue what they're missing out on. So I kind of feel sorry for them sometimes. Anyway, great post! Thanks for sharing.

(lia) said...

I'm new to your blog but I had to tell you I thought this story was really cute. Yes, totally random but so funny.